I am a renowned international expert on Whimsy. One can immediately discern that upon seeing all the letters that follow my name -- Dr. Noah Clawson, Ph.D, MD, Run-DMC. In my professional capacity, I once wrote a treetise (not a treatise). Currently, absolutely nobody understands the differences between a treetise and a treatise. Well the differences are simple.
1) A treetise serves as an addendum to my novel Mandelbrot The Tree, while a treatise does not.
2) Treetise's utilize whimsy to communicate a point whereas treatises don't.
3) Treetise is a playful term that I coined two minutes prior to writing this sentence. By contrast, the term Treatise is stodgy, was not coined by me and first appeared in the 14th century.
A few years back, I sent a treetise to Anthony Van Jones -- a frequent CNN commentator. To my great shock, Mr. Van Jones never responded back. I know now that he didn't respond, because the DOPR (Department of Permanent Records) blocked him from responding.
The DOPR has dogged me ever since I was in the 8th grade. At that time, the principal of my school told me, "Noah, if you don't improve your behavior, it will go on your Permanent record" Unfortunately, I didn't improve my behavior, and my principal informed the DOPR. If I had only known the consequences of my bad behavior then, I would have been a much better boy. To this day, the DOPR lurks in the background and does all the little shadowy things necessary to complicate my life. Yesterday, they broke into my apartment and stole my socks.
Tomorrow, I intend to publish the first part of the above mentioned treetise on this blog. I pray that the DOPR does not find out about it and run interference.
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